Confessions of an Australian Bar Maid: Character Study - The Drunkard

THE DRUNKARD:

• Slurs, leans, spits, sweats, dribbles, yells and has often lost all grasp of the local language
• Can’t stay upright under their own power and needs a chair, a bar or a friend to stand up
• Notorious for ordering drinks and not paying for them, leaving them on the bar and walking off without them or spilling them before drinking them
• Often accompanied by a more sober and very annoyed cohort who has gone from friend to babysitter
• Often cannot find money, get hands in their pockets or afford drinks, to the disgust and financial detriment of aforementioned babysitter
• Ends the night on the floor, toilet, ‘dancing’ wildly with possible loss of clothing and/or being turfed out by security
• Lights cigarettes at the wrong end

SUMMARY: Disgusting, confusing, amusing and entertaining all at once – a real all rounder